3.07.2011

We ALL have a voice...

Today, while waiting for my children to get done with school, I really didn't have anything to do. So, I parked in a public parking lot and was reading an art magazine. I had been listening to the radio, but got tired of the commercials, so I shut it off. Everything was quiet and all of a sudden I heard all this yelling and swearing. It was a man and women. I could not see them and did not know where the screaming and yelling was coming from. I rolled down my window and listened. I was looking frantically all over...

Finally, I seen them! The women was toting two large baskets full of stuff. One stacked on top of the other. She was crying and telling the man to just let her go! Quite a few other things were said, but you get the idea. The man was wearing a t-shirt, shorts and was barefoot! Yes, barefoot! Mind you, it was in the 20's with a sleet/snow mix coming down. He was running ahead of her and yelled, you are not leaving! If you leave, I will break that f-ing windshield.

I dialed 911 on my cell phone and hit send. I hung up immediately and thought to myself, I will wait just a bit and see what happens. I was scared for her. Their vehicle was about 6 spaces down from mine and cars parked all around us/them. The windows were wet from the rain and they didn't know I was there.

The yelling, arguing, and swearing went on for a while. He locked himself in the vehicle and would not let her in to leave. He kept opening and shutting the door, yelling and so forth. I thought something may happen because at this time things were escalating. I got out of my van and waved my arms so she could see me and put my hand up to my ear and showed her the phone. I mouthed the words "do you want me to call the cops?"

She yelled to the man and said, if you don't let me go, that lady is going to call the cops. Some more swearing and rudeness came out of his mouth and then he seen me. I stepped closer to their vehicle. He immediately retracted and I think he was ashamed. He said he would never hurt her or break the windshield. The lady said, yeah right! I told them, I have seen to much domestic violence in my life and I am not about to let anything happen on my watch. I told them, I will call the cops if need be.

I waited outside in the rain/snow, until she left. In the meantime, there was a gal that seen the last tail end of it. She pulled up to me, rolled her window down, asked what had happened. I briefly explained. She said, you may have just saved her life. I don't know if I did save her life. None of us ever know what goes on behind closed doors or in a mentally unstable person's mind.

I just know, he was trying to control her and she wanted to leave. He was threatening her and I feel things could have escalated, had I not been there. I just know, when domestic violence (or any violence for that matter) is going on and you hear/see it, you should speak up! It is your civic duty to try to help or speak up! I honestly feel that way.

It is so odd to think that I was not suppose to be there, at that time, and in that place. I never go there and today, of all days, I was there. I do believe everything happens for a reason. Maybe I was supposed to be there to help that gal? Who knows what could have happened. There was no one else around during the whole incident, only me, until the tail end. I was glad I was there and I was glad I spoke up.

I know someone may read this that thinks, well, Tonya probably made things worse. Or maybe thinking that gal is back in that same situation tonight. Well, maybe she is? But I know, I did what was right. That is all that matters. I cannot control what others do and how they handle a situation. All I can do is try to help when I feel someone needs help. I did my civic duty and just thought I would share my story. Maybe someday it could be your daughter, your grand daughter, niece, or sister, and wouldn't you like to know that someone would speak up on her behalf. Something to think about. Peaceful Blessings to each of you, Tonya

8 comments:

Judy Mathis said...

Tonya, I feel you were there for a reason and it was to help save that woman. You were so brave and I commend you for having the courage to help. I hope I would do the same thing if put in that position, way to go girl.

Loafer Mountain Primitives said...

I personaly, think you did the right thing!
I'm one that will step forward and speak up when needed. There are times I have to ask myself, after the fact, was that the right thing? You could have been hurt... But if we don't, there are bullies that will always try to push others around. I believe in people helping others...
Way to go...
Tisha

Patty Sumner said...

Good for you Tonya! You did the right thing for that moment in time. What the lady does with her life now is up to her. Blessings and thanks for speaking up!

Hanni said...

Wow, what an experiense. I am glad you did what you did. This man must have been not right in his mind,because he wsn't wearing any shoes in freezing temperatures. Very sad for this woman, I do hope she gets the help she needs. I do believe in speaking up, some people might not like it and say it is not our business. In one way I think it is, because he took it out in a public place. Very scary indeed. Hopefully this woman comes to her right senses and leave him and he gets all the help he needs.

Rosanna said...

Often it is the silence and indifference to kill many women. Tonya Brava
Kiss
Rosanna

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The Moonlit Stitch said...

I commend you for not looking the other way. I know so many people who will not advocate for others (abused women, bullied children, seniors, etc). It can be uncomfortable to "use your voice", but there is danger in comfort also. Bless you for doing the right thing! Way to go! ~*~Lisa

Roberta said...

Tonya, that was so brave of you to stick up for that poor woman. You never expect to witness something like that but you gave at least a spark of hope to that lady and let her know that it wasn't okay or normal for that guy to be yelling at her and treating her that way.
~Roberta